ASO Terra Lingua: Personality Development

We at ASO Terra Lingua are currently conducting various Personalty Development Workshops for Colleges and Corporations. One of the first questions which comes up is always: "What is Personalty exactly?". So we took this up and defined this broad subject in the following short article:

What is Personality?

Personality Defined

Are you looking to define personality traits? Personality is a pretty important word in the English language. If you ask someone why they chose their spouse or what the most important quality the look for in a friend is, most people many people will say “a good personality.” But, what does that mean? The truth is, the meaning of a “good personality” is different for everyone. Some people like quiet people, while others want to hang out with the loudest person in the room. Some value humor, while others praise intellect. And, of course, many people can have both intellect and humor and these things are both part of their personalities. These different factors, in fact, are considered to be personality traits.

Stick out!

What makes a winning Personality? How can I develop my Personality?

Over seventy years ago, Dale Carnegie wrote the classic, How to Win Friends and Influence People. It's all about human relationships and how to be more effective when dealing with people. It's a great book but it's not very practical. Who can walk around, meet people and try to recall some fifty different rules that should be applied to present a winning personality? What is needed is a short, concise and to the point formula, something that will encompass all of what Carnegie and others had to say on the subject. 

There are two basic elements upon which a winning personality is based. The first is caring about people and the other one is a close cousin of caring which is, making people feel good about themselves. Sounds easy enough but in actuality, it's not that simple.

First, we cannot fake about caring. Either we do or we don't. Any attempt to fake caring is the perfect recipe for disaster. People will see right through it and will be put off by the charade. There is nothing as toxic as a lack of sincerity in human relation so it is to be avoided at all cost.

Caring about people is something that can be learned and it is not all that difficult. We simply have to remind ourselves how important people are. The people that we come in contact with, either directly or indirectly, can make us or break us. They literally hold our future in their hands. They are the ones who will either give us what we want or walk away from us.

If we care about people, they will care about us. There is something contagious about caring. It is the highest compliment that we can give to someone. It means, you are someone important, you matter. It is respect and acceptance all rolled into one. It is the golden rule at its finest. When we care about someone, we are treating that person the way that we would like to be treated. It's an irresistible magnet.

The next elements needed to have a winning personality are to make people feel good about themselves. One of the primordial human needs is significance. We all need to feel that we are important, that we matter. 

Making someone feeling good about themselves is one of the most effective way to fill that need.

Again, making people feel good about themselves cannot be faked. If we believe that they are worthy, the message will come through naturally. That message will be expressed in body language, in the words that we used and in the tone that we use to express those words. Our deepest feelings have a way of expressing themselves that cannot be denied, missed or misunderstood. The heart speaks louder and more clearly than words ever could.

Thumbs Up!

So, if you want to have a winning personality, truly care about people, make them feel good about themselves... and they'll think the world of you. 

That's what a winning personality is all about!